Why I finally love Father's Day...

Perhaps it was the pregnancy announcement that my brother and his girlfriend had recently made saying there was a "Baby Kleinschmidt" due in January that made this year the most difficult Father's Day yet.

Each year as the days passed, the anniversary of my daddy's death comes and goes, along with his birthday, his wedding anniversary to my mom; seven times now. Seven years without him, seven years of holidays and memories of me thinking "Damn, I really wish daddy were here to see this, hear this, feel this." Still, nothing compares to having a Father's Day without him. Absolutely nothing.

I was the luckiest girl in the world to have a man like him in my life. As strict and serious as he was; nobody got to see the softer side of him like I did. I was blessed to see the sides of him he wouldn't show anyone. He was a baseball coach to boys and men, still, he would come home and let me sleep in his lap. He would show up on dates if he did not get a good feeling about a guy, and take me out for dinner instead. Even when I was in trouble, I was never "really in trouble." Had that big man wrapped around my little finger, and I loved every moment of it.

God gave me someone for 19 years who shaped the person I am today. Every positive characteristic about myself is because of my father, and for that I will forever be thankful. 

It's strange. This has been the best year of my life. I have everything I have ever wanted, but he isn't here. 

I realize I am not the only person in the world to lose a parent, or the only daughter whose father was taken away from her at 19, still, I decided instead of ignoring this day and curling up like a little ball, I will celebrate this day. I will make sure each and every one of my friends and family gives their dads a call and tells him they love him. I didn't always go above and beyond for daddy, but I didn't realize how important those little moments were until he was gone. Now those moments are in a small box that I go through late at night and cry my eyes out.  Take advantage of every moment. Please. 

For those of you who do not have a father still with us, you will be in my thoughts and prayers. 

This could easily be the most difficult Father's Day yet, but probably the best one since he's been gone.

Rest in Peace Daddy, I love you.

-Jessie

Antisocial Media: My Life in this Industry

Before I get started...I want to make sure you know this is my PERSONAL blog. This is in no way affiliated with my employers.

I have also written something similar, but some recent events have happened, and there aren't many people in my life who understand what I go through on social media, so here it goes.

I have been blessed beyond belief in so many ways with how my career has been progressing. Mind you, I'm the most impatient person in the world so there are days I second guess myself and am annoyed that I am not working for ESPN or Fox Sports 1, but I have to remember my hard work will eventually pay off.

So naturally, as I'm trying to make a name for myself in this industry, there are several people who are trying to ruin it for me. I realize you're supposed to "ignore it and let it go," but you're full of shit if you act like it doesn't bother you. If you notice there are a lot of athletes and celebrities who rarely reply to tweets and messages on social media (not saying it's a bad thing) unless it's something negative, then a response usually occurs.

Why is that? Why is it that we can take all of the compliments and positive things that are being said to us and let them roll off of our minds, but the moment something negative is introduced, we let that small phrase, the minute sentence, stick to us like glue?

I've stumbled upon a group of females that I used to consider being cool with. We had even exchanged secrets at one point. Now, through the circles I hear the most terrible things being said about me. And it's hurtful. In this case, I didn't just sit and let it happen, I confronted one of them, and received no response. Like the coward she was, she did not respond and blocked me from every social media outlet that we were "friends" on.

Which is okay. I don't need negative people like that in my life.

The strangest thing is: these women are trying to make it in this industry as well. We are supposed to support one another, be there for one another, and yet here I am dodging bullets that are being shot at me from behind a phone case.

I have been called every name on social media from a cleat chaser to a dumb bitch, and that is okay. I love that on social media you can say whatever the hell you want, but when you put the phone down and the people you ignore on social media are right in front of you, what can you think? It's scary.

I just feel if you're the type of person who will only talk shit over social media, and not to my face (ahem A's Fan Fest) then really, I would love it if I could block you from my real life as well. And that is exactly what I am going to do. I don't have to deal read 140 characters from you, retweet a #hashtag, or give you a star that you do not deserve.

I really don't understand it, and perhaps I never will.